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    Worst Jokes!

    This is a discussion on Worst Jokes! within the General chat forums, part of the Community channel category; In an effort to help with their puppy training, the RNIB has asked that the supermarkets remove all their toilet ...

    1. #11
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      In an effort to help with their puppy training, the RNIB has asked that the supermarkets remove all their toilet rolls off the shelves.


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    3. #12
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      Re: Worst Jokes!


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    4. #13
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      The defendant and his lawyer are in the courtroom, the man being charged with theft. The lawyer tells the crusty old judge, "My lord, my client has produced receipts for, firstly, the high speed modem."

      "High-speed modem?" questions the judge.

      "Yes" replies the lawyer, "It allows computers to communicate over vast distances at high rates of speed. It allows email and something called cybersex in chatrooms, your honor."

      "Cybersex?" says the judge, "You mean sex through a modem? You mean sex on a monitor? Good lord, the morals of this society! Sex should be a natural event of nature!"

      "Secondly, my lord," continues the lawyer, "My client can produce a receipt for the high-speed cd-rom."

      "High-speed cd-rom?" queries the judge.

      "Yes my lord, it enables millions of bits of information to be read off a small disk."

      "And I suppose most of this information is cybersex related... Modern technology and modern society, baffling, just baffling," comments the judge. "I'm appalled at what technology is doing to society these days."

      "Thirdly my lord, my client can produce a receipt for the super deluxe inflatable milk maid, whatever that is."

      "That's the one with the silicone breasts and real hair," replies the judge.
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    5. #14
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      Re: Worst Jokes!


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    6. #15
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his shrink what to do. The shrink said that since Christmas was coming up that he should ask Johnny what he wanted Santa to bring him. If he cussed he should leave a pile of dog ****
      in place of the gift.

      Two days before Christmas Johnny's dad asked Johnny what he wanted.

      Johnny said, "I want a goddamned teddy-bear laying right ****in here beside me when I wake-up Christmas morning. Then, when I go downstairs, I want to see a mother-****in' train going around the goddamned tree, and when I go outside I want to see a red-assed ****in' bike leaning up against the damn garage!"

      Christmas morning, Little Johnny woke up and rolled over into a big pile of dog ****. Confused, he walked downstairs and saw a bunch of
      dog **** around the Christmas tree. Scratching his head, he walked outside and saw a huge pile of dog **** by the garage. When he walked
      back inside with a curious look on his face, his dad smiled and asked, "So Johnny, what did Santa bring you this year?"

      Johnny replied, "I think I got a goddamned dog but I can't find the son of a bitch."
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    7. #16
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      My boyfriend is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.

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    8. #17
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.

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    9. #18
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      The Devon and Cornwall Music Festival 2020 has been cancelled.

      They couldn't decide which group should go on first, The Jam or Cream.




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    10. #19
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      Q. Where is Hadrian's Wall?


      .

      .

      .

      .

      A. Around his garden.

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    11. #20
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      Re: Worst Jokes!

      I was walking along the beach the other day, when a large flatfish carrying a knife, came out of the water, backed me up against the cliff and demanded I hand over my wallet.


      Well, what could I do? I was caught between a rock and a hard plaice.
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