GILFACH EARTHQUAKE APPEAL

A major earthquake mesuring 7.8 on the Richter scale hit in the early hours of 14th
january 2007 the epicentre was on Gilfach Goch South Wales.

Victims can be seen wandering aimlessly muttering "how be?", "Tidy" and "cant fault it"

The earthquake devestated the area causing approximately 18.75 worths of dammage.
Several priceless collections of momentos from porthcawl and cardiff jail were
destroyed.

Many people were woken well before their Gyros arrived, thousands of confused and bewilderd People,
trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting happened in the Valley's.

One resident, Shara anharad jones a 15 year old mother of 3 said "It was such a shock, at first i though it was the bailiffs, then little Chardony-mercedes came running into my bedroom and nearly woke the guy from the housing benifit office".

My youngest 2 Tyler-morgan and Jade-Storm slept through it.
I was still shaking while i was watching Jerimy Kyle the next day.

Fortunately the residents have been able to carry on looting, mugging and car crime much as before.

The britsh red cross has so far managed to fly vital medical supply's such as anphetamine sulphate, strongbow and marzie eggs. Rescue workers are still working through rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings including, Benifit cards jewellary from Elizabeth Dukes at Argos and fine bone china from Hyper Value.

HOW CAN YOU HELP

This Appeal is to collect clothing and food parcles as well as money for those unfortunate to be caught up in it.
Clothing items sort include:- Fila Baseball caps, Cappa tracksuite tops "his and hers", white sports socks Nike Air basketball boots and any items usually on sale at Everything is a pound.

Food items required:- Microwave meals , tin baked beans, Pot noodles, ice cream, cans of Special Brew and Diamond White.

WHAT WILL YOUR DONATION PROVIDE

2 will buy chip scrimps and Blue Pop- for a family of 4.
10 Can take a family of 7 to Port Talbot for the day, where the children can play on a radioactive beach in front of the national collection of steel works.
2.50 buys a rover bus ticket for the head of the household to travel to the countryside to pick Magic Mushrooms to sell at the next dog fight.
22p buys a Biro pen to fill in a crisis form at the DSS.

IMPORTANT!

Please under no circumstances send tents, as the site of "Posh" housing could upset the neighbouring areas of Trebanog and Tonyrefail, and then may also cause rioting in these places.